Being a mentee means questioning with your mentor your certainties, habits of thinking and actions to better achieve your goals. Without taboos, the mentee expresses himself on past and present situations, and the emotions that emerge in his professional daily life. He shares his questions, his uncertainties, his values, his motivations and his ambitions. The mentee freely revisits his objectives, needs and expectations in a climate of benevolence giving rise to new approaches. The mentee goes to the end of his experience by realizing how he is learning to learn.
Join the mentor / mentee relationship
Being a mentee implies placing yourself in a particular position at the heart of the interindividual relationship with your mentor. This relationship implies a certain number of prerequisites in the interpersonal process. Mentor side: benevolence, qualitative listening and patience. Mentee side: a desire to invest in the relationship to move the lines, learn and enrich mentoring conversations.
The content of the exchanges often exceeds by its richness what is immediately applicable in an action plan. Upstream of the mentoring process, it is the identification and expression of specific professional needs that places you in the initial situation of a mentee.
Clarify your requests
Throughout the mentoring process which feels like a journey of discovery – of yourself, through the prism of mentee status, and of the person who becomes your mentor – you exercise a continuous work to clarify your requests. This attitude gives you the opportunity to identify, qualify and then prioritize what you really need in terms of development.
Sometimes a tree can hide the forest. A mentoring goal can be kaleidoscopic and function like a tree structure. Several read entries are possible. Different shades appear depending on the viewing angle. The perceptions of these goals describe new ramifications that you explore with your mentor.
Discover yourself in depth
This is the reason why a 360 ° exploration attitude of oneself and of its interactions in different typologies of environments is required on the part of the mentee as well as the acceptance of a constant form of agility. An ability to question oneself, not to get bogged down in an analysis or a perception, to question oneself and explore situations from all angles, to put oneself in a movement and immerse oneself in the mentoring experience to be able to take full advantage of its benefits. The mentee walks according to a Test & Learn modality : I apply, I test, I integrate into my practices what I retain or leave out what is not useful to me and continue with this dynamic.
WEBINAR: being mentored to make giant leaps
You can’t stand at the window and watch yourself walking in the street. To observe oneself means to watch oneself act in specific contexts like an external observer, without preconceived ideas or a priori. The nature of the mentoring conversation with its intrinsic rules enables this exercise. Be ready to question your certainties and perceptions facilitates the practice of this doubling which brings a form of inner flexibility, a coherence and a lightness linked to the joy of being again connected to oneself in a personal alignment.
Make the effort to exteriorize your thoughts: connect to yourself
It is necessary to pay attention to what is felt. Our inner voices immerse us in a world that can overtake us and leave a feeling of lack of control. Emotion is an indicator that tells us about our interaction with our environment. As a mentee, you will express your professional emotions as well as your aspirations and impulses.
You will become aware of what you are going through by putting specific words on the situations encountered. You will verbalize your concerns, in the freedom and confidentiality of the mentoring conversations, by expressing the bundle of your feelings. You will be taken to become aware of your relationship habits and to try other postures and approaches as well in your interpersonal skills as in your communications. We often tend to feel the same emotions and relive identical situations. The experience tends to repeat itself. Mentoring curves the curve of experience by allowing you to get to know yourself better in situations, in the field. It directs the trajectory you take in a different way, enriched by your conversations with your mentor.
You will analyze, with your mentor, the positive and negative conjectures of your experience. By identifying the blind spots of your perceptions, you will broaden the field of possibilities. By abandoning perfect scenarios of what to do, you will gain access to a real form of personal reassurance and will increase your confidence. You will understand that there is always a possibility to act beyond the difficulties perceived or felt.
Thanks to stills with your mentor, you will adapt your path and initiate new paths. This inner roaming will lead you on the paths of innovation and other strategies of action and personal realization.
Take a step back
Mentoring impacts the relationship to time. By forcing you to give yourself new importance through a phenomenon of distancing and taking a step back, you will benefit from a structured approach to time to benefit from a space of freedom that will facilitate your professional as well as personal development. .
You will be required to desecrate issues, situations, functions, hierarchical relationships, managerial and leadership practices. You will access a first and balanced simplicity which will be your new compass.
Gisèle Szczyglak is an executive coach, an expert in leadership, mentoring and diversity issues. This text is taken from his book “Le mentoring pour les dummies” published by First editions, 306 pages, 8.95 euros.
France-Quebec Mentoring Week